“You are very fortunate to get to do what you want. I never had that freedom. My parents never allowed. There was no support. Had they been supportive I would have been someone different.”
No sir - I was not fortunate. I grew up like you. Was told to take up science when I wished for humanities, Medicine instead of Home science… and when finally I decided to quit an established Surgical Practice in favor of what I am doing today - everyone, those close at home and the not so close, all without exceptions told me, “you are out of your mind. No one quits a medical profession for something as vague as counseling. You will end up loosing it all.”
But finally I got the chance to make my choice- and I chose what I knew after a good amount of research to be the ‘thing’ for me. Path was not easy of course as what I do today had no existence or acceptance in this part of the world. But today when I do look like a success this is what they say to me, “You are very fortunate to…”
Go back and check on your life. Did you never have a choice or an option? Do you feel you have options today? “It is so difficult. There are demands on my time you know. I need to earn or take care of a family etc. etc. …” It still amazes me every time I hear it!! Who doesn’t have demands on their time? Who is free of responsibilities? I had two kids below 6, Indian in - laws, a husband and a medical career with no way to afford full time help. I remember having stayed up night after night for years scanning pages and researching and preparing for the next day. The only time I could give to my passion was that after everything was set right for everyone around me.
But it is not that. I know when they say I can’t what they mean is I won’t- “I won’t sacrifice my sleep, I won’t miss the Saturday outings, I won’t miss that weekend afternoon sleep- after all I have earned it, I won’t study anymore… I won’t…”
Just as it is easier for most people to take a tranquilizer, rather than to solve the cause of tension, so it is easier for most to let the opinions of others guide them, rather than to do their own thinking.
They prefer to complain and criticize even the parents who did the best for them rather than take it up and work on their dreams.
Of course it would require study, research, guidance and efforts but it is not that it can’t be done. To students I say that even if your parents force a graduation on you today, do it as a base degree…you have to do something so why not this? Then finally with a degree in hand and employment ready you will be in a position to make your decisions and stand by them.
There is nothing that can’t be done. We have too many examples of extraordinary successes around us. But to them we like to say, “He is so fortunate- I am really the doomed one.”
Which one are you?
Title image: Savofair